First Band-Aid

I was a terrible mom this morning. It breaks my heart to even tell this story. After feeding my sweet baby, I laid him down on the changing table to change his diaper and put him in his outfit for the day. As I was doing this, I noticed that his fingernails needed clipping again. These things grow soooo fast!! I feel like I just clipped them yesterday (ok last week, but still!). I held his fingers really tightly and got one successfully clipped and then started on the next one. When I clipped that one, his eyes flew open really big, his arms jolted out, and he started wailing. OH MY GOODNESS! I clipped my baby's FINGER!!! I have been dreading this ever happening but got brave after a few successful times of clipping with no incidents. Well, we had an incident today, folks!! I felt SOOOO bad. I grabbed him up and sat down in his glider with him as I rocked him and told him over and over again how sorry I was while he cried. Seeing a little blood, I panicked and grabbed a kleenex to hold pressure over his little bitty precious finger to stop the bleeding. By that point he had settled down but was still doing the haggard breathing. It took a while to stop bleeding so I face-timed my parents so I could show my mom his finger and see if she could tell me what to do...and to tell on myself about what a bad mom I had been. She told me that it happens all the time and won't be the last thing I do on accident to him (oh no! I don't think I can handle anything else!). Mom said that his finger looked fine and that I should just put a band-aid on it or something. I had some Toy Story bandaids, so I had my mom stay on the phone with me while I bandaged my baby up. It looked pitiful! The first bandaid didn't work, so I went for a second attempt. This is what a grown-up sized band-aid looks like on an itty bitty teensy weensy finger:

Pitiful right?! It didn't stay on very long and the cut isn't THAT bad, but it still makes me so sad everytime I catch a glimpse of it. I feel like he has been looking at me all day in a way that says "why did you do that to me, Mom?" So I keep apologizing. The clippers are still where they were when the "incident" happened because I can't bare to touch them right now. Everytime I change him, I see those mean clippers and remember. I can't wait for Drew to get home so he can put those clippers up and we can move on from this traggic event. Hope your day has been better than Grayson's!