Building Things and Dreams

**Unbeknownst to many, my lifelong dream has always been to write a blog, and so my sweet wife has stepped aside to let me provide the binary ink for a short session. In a manner of words: I'm a guest blogger. How sweet.
Unfortunately for Tara's regular projected demographics, my references and jokes may slide right over your head, so I'll help out when possible.
All premises aside: here's Tara's Husband's Guest Blogwork, titled: Building the Magic.





You can't start a fire without gasoline, and you can't build a hutch without wood. Wood is typically sold in 6' or 8' pieces; I like 8' pieces, but without a truck, transportation can be a beating. Fortunately the Honda Element, with a slight degree of tinkering, is aptly able to load 8' pieces of lumber. If you ever played Dungeons and Dragons, my car is kind've like a bag of holding. In the photograph; we've got a bunch of 1"x4" furring strips for finish work, and 2"x2" furring strips for the frame.

This saw is awesome for two reasons: number one, the triforce imprint; and number two, it cuts the heck out of wood. If there's one thing a man cannot live without, it's his dad's miter saw.

Through the miracle of hard work and patience, all my wood has been cut. No awesome reference can be made, the wood was simply cut. There's an old saying: "I cut the board twice and it was still too short." I don't like that saying and neither should you. Why? Well, primarily because it challenges our intelligence. Who in their right mind would cut a board, realize that it's too short, and then cut it again? I understand the jist[sp?] of what is trying to be conveyed; but in all honesty, a better saying would be: "I cut the board once and settled for 'close enough'." That's right, unless someone is paying you for building something (or you're Bob Vila) don't sweat perfection.

Boom! The frame is built and at this point in the blog, I'm a bit self-conscious of blog etiquette, and am wondering if the text pertaining to a photograph is supposed to be beneath the picture or above the picture. Do you think that in high school these days they are teaching kids blog etiquette instead of the rules to writing a business letter? I don't know. As far as the picture above is concerned, the key to screwing wood together is drilling a pilot hole and then praying that the wood doesn't split as you drill in your screw.

At this point, the frame has been built and the first pieces of 1"x4" have been nailed in for shelving. Why are there weights on the bench and what is that clamp? Good questions: the weights are there for two reasons: number one, when cheap boards are bought for building furniture, they are often afflicted with severe crowning (a type of warping), and thus need some glue to help persuade them to lie flatter than the earth was pre-Columbus. Secondly, the weights are in the photo because I want to convey the idea that I lift weights. In reality I don't, yet it would be nice if I did; but is just as well if you believe that I do.

Hurray, everything has been put together! The 1x4's have been used for shelving as well as a finish piece to hide the exposed ends of the 2x2's. How did all of this get accomplished so quickly? Easy, I worked under the musical guidance of some great bands. You may like them too! Brave Saint Saturn is a Christian band with the best vocals and lyrics I have ever heard, The Vandals kept my blood pumping, and mae reduced my blood pressure when it began quaking so hard that it was actually gushing out of my ears.

That's me painting. The key? Well, wearing your socks like an old man of course!

Completion! I may throw on one more coat of stain, but at this point I've already washed my hands with gasoline and don't want to kill many more brain cells (i've got none-too-many left). For dedication purposes, I cannot consider my wife because she would not meet my request to allow me to build the hutch in the comfort of our air conditioned living room (something about sawdust getting in the carpet). So, I would like to dedicate the building of this hutch to Katsunori Kikuno. Who is that you ask? Well, he is a mixed martial artist who kicks people in the liver.

Thanks for your time and patience; and thank you for allowing me to live out my dream of writing a blog. I can now die happily.